A day later, and I'm still tired from Tuesday night... when the dude that lives directly above Babe played his damn blasted unidentifiable music all night. That was the second night I couldn't sleep because the bass from his music was very audible through the walls. The first time, I tried unsuccessfully to sleep through it, and ended up staying up until around 5am. This time, I trudged upstairs to tell him to turn it down.

I knock on his door a bunch of times before I finally got a gruff "Who is it?" "A neighbor in this apartment complex." "Aw SHIT. Hold on..." I hold on for a couple of tense seconds... between 5 and 10. Then the dude swings the door wide open, and a dog immediately runs out into my legs. That takes me by surprise, and I bend down instinctively to give it a quick pet-pet on the head. It is short and whitish with brownish patches, and looks simultaneously like a pig and a fat pug. And there is the dude, standing in the doorway with nothing but boxers on, with coloring and form similar to his dog. Immediately, I imagine he'd just put those boxers on. I wonder, What on earth was he doing before I knocked?

My eyes are squinting, not yet adjusted to the hallway light. And the sight of the dude makes them squint further. His studio is dark, and the lighting seems really muted, as if from a flashlight inside of a tent or a small desk lamp with a think shade. No one else seems to be in the room. I smell nothing. But I see much flesh and hair. The dude is not slim, though in the dim lighting, and behind the abundant body hair, he appears heavy as opposed to fatty, solid as opposed to flabby. He and his animal do not look like the dude and dog that I'd met in the halls a couple of times, who I thought lived in that studio. I start to think he is a new neighbor, and feel a little less angry about the situation.

I say, "sorry to bother you," and ask him if he can turn his music down. He acts apologetic and says he'll turn it off, not down. He adds, "It's been a bad night." I'm still a bit thrown off by the dog and the skin and the light, so "it's been a bad night" just adds to the swirling curiosity. What exactly does he mean by that? Was it just an offhand remark? Or is he implying or trying to explain something? He asks if I live in the downstairs apartment. I say yes, though technically I don't and don't want to say that I do.

Within minutes after I get back into bed, I fall asleep. I have a dream that the upstairs guy is a hairy hippie who, after meeting me one time, tries to get me to ask me out on a date. I tell him about my boyfriend, and he gets really upset. He goes from upset to psycho, and chases Babe and me around the apartment complex with a gun in his hand with the intent to kill. Bullets are flying everywhere, and I am freaking out and trying dodge them.

When I wake up later, I'm convinced that my dream is influenced by a dinner I had on Monday, during which a guy I was having dinner with suddenly asked me out on a date. The purpose of the dinner was supposed to be to discuss some volunteer opportunities within a non-profit association of asian-am professionals, and I'd made that clear before the dinner. So his asking me out on a date really bothered me. I'd only seen him a couple of times in the past, at networking events, and once over lunch to discuss volunteering. I should've been suspicious then, when all he talked about during lunch was himself, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt... figuring he would be so unprofessional as to try to turn a business-y lunch meeting into something more.

He never asked if I had a boyfriend, and just assumed I was single. And, well, I didn't mention my boyfriend because I didn't think I needed to! How exactly does one gracefully broach that subject without seeming presumptive and suspicious? That one's had me stumped for years. I don't get out that much, and therefore, don't deal with these scenarios often.

After that, I came to terms with the fact that the mixers that I've gone to were fronts for meat markets. I wanted so much for that to not be true, and to be able to actually get some good business contacts out of them. But shit... I was asked out by just about every male contact I met at those networking events. I'm fucking disappointed. I feel gypped. I feel fooled... I'm just... well, a bit shellshocked... adding to the shellshock I'm still feeling from that last interview...

So where that does this all leave me? I'm not sure yet. But I sure am damn tired.

I had another interview yesterday, this time for a sales rep position.

I thought I was prepared enough for the questions I could be asked, but I really wasn't. I ummed and stuttered and paused and rolled my eyes to the upper right a lot while trying to articulate the answers I was thinking. I wasn't smooth. I should've practiced verbalizing my answers more. And I should've exaggerated more. Gosh, everything is a learning experience these days.

I felt beat coming out of the interview. Beat on many levels. Humbled. As if I wasn't already beat and humbled enough...

I missed the second class of hula because of the interview. The first class wasn't quite what I expected. It's hula, so I imagined fun, laughter, and a congenial, positive, and easy-going instructor. The instructor we got is strict, serious, and seems to favor negative constructive criticism. Kinda like a high school gym teacher. She didn't try to sweeten anything up for us beginners. And there will be no skimpy outfits. No grass skirts and no coconut bras. But we'll be required to make our own long, voluminous black skirts. Nun-wear. Nevertheless, I forked out $150 for two months of classes.

I've had greater variety of thoughts and feelings lately, thanks to the new career pursuit and a few other new things I've myself gotten into.

At Starbucks, I usually order a tall frap, coffee or chai latte.

Yesterday, I ordered a grande non-fat chai latte around 7:30pm, before having dinner. I found out that I can't do Starbucks grandes... at least not on an empty stomach. I start trippin'.

I went to a networking mixer with my grande non-fat chai latte in hand. I went to another one of these mixers a couple weeks ago. Figure I really need to meet new people in the right industries who could possibly help me move in the direction of pharmaceutical sales, or something better. There were supposed to me more females at last night's mixer because it was a joint effort with a Korean women's group. Apparently, the group was a no show. So I just saw the same dudes I met at the first mixer.

I was nearly bouncing off the walls at the venue. A couple minutes after I arrived, I was already sweating. I was made fun of by several dudes for holding a caffienated beverage instead of beer or a mixed drink. It's my budding career at stake. I won't let a cosmo or two ruin it for me. A few people wouldn't let up about it, even after I tried to explain that they really don't know me, and wouldn't want to know me after I start drinking... wtf? This ain't Drink Club! Leave me alone, and go find yourself another lush!

If I learned anything from the last mixer, it's that they can be pretty loud and frenzied 'cuz there are dozens of people trying to get their words in with each other, and maybe also with you. If you're female, you become an oasis for people to gather around. I was nervous about conversing with new people in a big group setting, and the caffeine just made me feel worse. I get distracted very easily. It's hard for me to focus on a single thing that's happening. Conversations are hard to follow. I don't know which to join or continue, when so many are bombarding me at once. I don't know how to leave them gracefully when I should or when I want to. I feel as if I can't breathe. I get dizzy. Big group social situations are stressful for me, even without the extreme jitters from too much caffeine.

By the time I made an early, ungraceful exit, I felt as if going into sales might be a bad idea. I hadn't met anyone that could really help me. And it feels cheap to be attempting to jump on the bandwagon this late. I mean, I really didn't realize until recently that everyone and his/her friend is trying to get into pharmaceutical sales. Where have I been all this time? Probably somewhere on the internet... I'm still going to try to get into sales. The new endeavor is keeping my mind occupied.

After the mixer, I headed over to play poker with the usuals. It felt good to hang out with people I've known for awhile. Gave me a chance to come down. But I was still wired three hours later when I went to bed. I couldn't get a good night's sleep until around 5-6am, and not before having a few strange dreams that I could physically feel.

In one of the dreams, we were being force-fed pot by people who were supposed to be our friends. They sequestered us in their home and cooked and fed us the pot-laced meals. We were high but sick and upset all the time. We wanted to come off the drugs and escape the house, but couldn't 'cuz we were so wasted and weak. Physically, I felt the same way I feel when I'm on Nyquil... the twisting and turning and swirling of thoughts and images in my head...

Damn Starbucks' non-fat grande chai tea latte...

We were in Las Vegas this past weekend and Monday.

Vegas is better than ever. It's interesting to see how quickly the strip is developing and how big the casinos are getting. Hopefully, the new shops and attractions that are popping up all up and down the strip will result in more females visiting the city. There are still far more men than women in the casinos, and far more women than men on the stages. That should change.

On Saturday night, I got drunk off of one of those yard-long margaritas. Go ahead and laugh at me. I laugh back because I find no shame in being a lightweight at this point in my life. I don't party much anymore... so what? My liver is going to live longer than I live. (I placed the pink donor dot on my new drivers license.)

While intoxicated, it was kinda fun trying to distinguish between the prostitutes and the non-prostitutes among the people on the street... We didn't end up doing the competitive scavenger hunt that we planned. Taking pictures with freaky looking people, stealing soap from hotel rooms, and kissing strangers just didn't seem like the best way to pass the time with the mix of friends we were in Vegas with this time.

Originally, I thought it was going be another testosterone-laden weekend. But one of the guys brought his girlfriend, and that tweaked the group dynamic and disposition. The girlfriend is still learning English, and spoke into her boyfriend's ear most of the time. I've never been one to bust in and initiate a new friendship. I'm shy, she's shy, and that's all we seemed to have in common, so we didn't really hit it off. I liked her hair, though.

We didn't end up going to any strip clubs this time. A trip to Vegas just doesn't seem 100% complete without seeing some flesh or a racy show. I wanted to see Zumanity or Mystere, but didn't do the smart thing and buy tickets in advance. We did the Star Trek experience at the Hilton on Monday. I screamed and got flung around. It wasn't Top Gun at Great America, but was amusing enough.

We checked out the wave pool at Mandalay Bay on Sunday. It was FREAKING HOT out. 104-106 degrees farenheit. Whatever qualms I had about the biological waste and microbes in pools and about revealing my body in its current shape melted away in minutes. I thought there were some good female bodies out there, though... a higher percentage of them than you'd find at the average hotel pool. Nicely tanned.

I've been more conscious about skin-health lately. Started noticing freckles last year, and have been using sunscreen more religiously since. Trying to figure out how to get tan this summer without endangering the health of my skin. Thought about trying a mystic tan, but didn't really like what I read about it online.

I lost $50 playing poker on Sunday night. I suck at poker, and I got played badly. I lost with AA, and didn't get to spin the wheel. If I don't ever want to run out of reasons to go to Vegas, I should get better at gambling sooner than later, or learn how to dance with no clothes on...

Oh, I'm taking my first hula class tonight. I'm excited about learning something new. I'll let you know how it goes.