Interesting how much a few pounds can affect my entire outlook, and change it so quickly... I'd been soaring. Now I'm down in the dirt...

Feeling unattractive has brought up insecurities that are souring the sweetness of the upcoming holidays. I've developed the imagined "stigma of the unattractive." With it comes irrational paranoia that my unattractiveness is causing people, friends and strangers, to shun or ignore me or be less eager to hang out with me or get to know me... and though I realize that people who might act that way are shallow and unworthy of my concern, I can't help agonizing the loss. That I am unloved, except by my family, is becoming an increasingly painful fact, and leads to the suspicion that I am unloved because I am unattractive.

Somewhere deep inside, I know that I'm just being silly...