I weighed in today.

It's so bad... I've put on almost 4 pounds in 2 months. WHY?? Where is my motivation to work out and eat better? It doesn't seem to be enough, anymore, to want to look awesome naked, or to get back into sports for a competitive outlet, or to have more energy to dance for hours and hours, or to be able to wear nicer, more flattering clothing... Seems like I need something more to get me back on the road & running, and back at the gym hurting & sweating, and cutting back on eating out & cookies...

I've already tried competing with people in "fab abs in three months" contests and the like... No progress. Maybe if I was going after someone or had someone to impress, I'd work a lot harder. Or maybe if there was money at stake... What was my driving force in the past? What exactly is keeping me from taking trying-to-look-better more seriously right now?