I feel very different from who I was last year, 2 years ago, and 3 years ago.

Core person is the same. Fundamental wants and needs are the same. Everyday goings-ons and routine of actions and attitudes are different. Outlook is definitely different.

I feel as if who I am now is more congruent with who I was as a child. I am more me than ever. And that feels good and right.

I was telling Babe last night that I remember what I imagined, when I was a child, that life would be like when I reached the age at which most people get married and buy houses. Now that I've arrived at that age, I've discovered life to be a lot less boring, domestic, uptight, void of fun and over than I'd imagined. I still feel like a youngster (in an oldster body), taking life less seriously and more casually than I thought I would at this age. Do we all, my peers, feel that way?

Buy a house? Get married? Sure. Ok. Not such a big step after all. Everyone's doing it. It's what people do.

Though a lot has changed drastically within my generation particularly, I begin to wonder if my parents felt similarly when they were my age now. Did they and other adults their age also feel as if they were youngsters doing "grown-up things" that seemed a lot less serious and momentous by the time they reached the age to do them? What would they think about the fact that my complaint at this age, at this moment, is that I don't get enough audio and visual stim?

They'd be jealous. Someday I'll be jealous of the younger generations too. Can hardly imagine what their lives will be like...