I'm physically/sexually attracted to a few men every once in awhile. But I don't meet or know many men that I'm truly mentally attracted to, with whom I'd like to be in a relationship. And I'm never really more than physically/sexually attracted to men who already belong to someone else. I think it's a hella stupid move to long for someone else's someone...

So I don't understand how/why some people can be attracted to people who are already taken. Why want someone who doesn't want you enough to not be with someone else? I could never consider a guy right for me who doesn't also think I'm right for him. If he's already taken, and I'm right for him, and he's right for me, he'll take steps to be un-taken... and maybe then I'll want him. I might come across a taken guy who has qualities I really dig. But then I'd want someone like him, not him.

Ok, there was this one time in college when I wanted a guy who already had a girlfriend... I was totally not his type. He would never want me or someone like me. And even though I knew that, I wanted so much to be with him. I was majorly crushing on him. Almost obsessed. Full of fantasies. Mad pining... It made me so sad that could never be the type of girl he wants. If only I was more cutesy, naive and innocent, if only I was younger, if only I had less issues, if only I was a little more happy-go-lucky and spunky... If, if, if... I beat myself over the head for not being what would get me his attention. THAT was stupid... 'cuz it made me feel as if I didn't deserve what I considered to be the perfect guy for me.

Of course now, years later, and a little wiser, I know he isn't/wasn't the perfect type of guy for me. (He was sweet, but mainly just a cute face on a hot bod.) I don't believe there's such a thing as, "he/she is perfect for me, though I'm not perfect for him/her." It's gotta go both ways. Equally. The one for me will be just as stoked about me as I am about him. And I know I do deserve a good guy... and that, in theory, there is a perfect him out there that fits me a lot better than anyone else... who I hope to find earlier in my lifetime than later...

While the pool of possibilities may be shrinking, he who's perfect for me will always be a possibility.