I'm upset 'cuz I haven't begun learning or creating anything since the start of the New Year.

People around me are signing up for classes for this and that... and I've signed up for nothing, bought no books (ok, two, but they haven't come in the mail yet), no supplies, no equipment, no instruments... thinking I can't or shouldn't spend to learn at this time.

I keep thinking that my task at hand is to keep myself alive and healthy past repayment of my debts... if that means I spend only/mainly/largely on things that will maintain my health. Good food. Medicine. Warm, yet cheap, clothing.

NO. I will learn now. I will spend to learn. I won't let my brain rot away. I won't just sit here suffering, depreciating, and atrophying. Be all that I can be, right? I will find the funds. Somewhere. Somehow.