tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35547472011-04-21T18:33:03.168-07:00ClimarityWhere fantasy meets reality... there I linger...bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comBlogger8921100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1136097329572371292005-12-31T22:30:00.000-08:002006-01-01T20:47:56.436-08:00It's the end of 2005 (the year that saw me turn 30)... and also the end of this blog.Yes, I've decided to move on from here. So much has gone unsaid for too long.Happy New Year!bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1133394041669823452005-11-30T15:36:00.000-08:002005-12-31T22:30:34.450-08:00I can't seem to dress myself older than 25. I've tried to shop for more age-appropriate clothing. No success. I'm at my wit's end... and I'm cold because I don't have enough weather-appropriate clothing either. I'd be wiling to pay someone with a good eye for style to help me buy new clothes.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1132621008632191172005-11-21T16:51:00.000-08:002005-11-21T17:32:18.526-08:00I've been obssessively watching Su Lin and Tai Shan, two panda bear cubs, on their respective Panda Cams (Su Lin - San Diego Zoo; Tai Shan - National Zoo, Animal Planet). They're the most lovable and adorable creatures EVER! If you have spare time or screen space, you should check them out. You might end up watching them all day long, like me. If they're sleeping when you first get a peek at bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1131740720300710242005-11-11T12:22:00.000-08:002005-11-11T18:49:43.760-08:00This is too much.Waaaaaay too fobby. These are the mascots for the 2005 Olympic Games in Beijing (article). China chose to put 5 cartoon faces forward to the rest of the world. Why can't China just let Japan be the cutesy Asian nation? And what do they call these over-the-top mascots? "The Friendlies" !"The animals were introduced as Bei Bei, Jing Jing, Huan Huan, Ying Ying and Ni Ni — whichbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1131149147089718722005-11-04T16:04:00.000-08:002005-11-11T18:48:30.213-08:00I'm planning to see Europe for the first time in May. I'll be travelling with Babe. We'll probably only have time to visit just two maybe three countries. Italy and France are top priority. I know so little about Europe. Though the trip is more than a half a year away, I've started looking online for info to help me come up with a rough itinerary. I need to do this now, this early. I needbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1130981122824884992005-11-02T17:23:00.000-08:002005-11-11T18:50:26.193-08:00My softball team won our first game of the season on Monday. We played against the other worst team in the league, and beat them by one run. Some of my teammates were excited and encouraged by this win. Am I? Nah... Beating the losingest team is not winning. It's just saving our own asses from being the losingest. We definitely need more practice.I've managed to not miss any softball games bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1130826810094710552005-10-31T22:26:00.000-08:002005-10-31T22:34:22.380-08:00Yet another one of our friends hit the big 3-0 last week. Babe and I got him this t-shirt:I wish it was sold in women's sizes. You know I'd totally wear it out.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1131043597710029182005-10-31T10:45:00.000-08:002005-11-03T10:48:54.830-08:00HAPPY HALLOWEEN!Me (angel) and Babe (convict) at a party in Hayward on Saturdaybittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1129744986643280172005-10-19T11:02:00.000-07:002005-10-19T16:54:20.650-07:00I finally got all of the pictures I had taken last month. If you tend to be a philosophical person and have been feeling a desperate need for radical thoughts or personal insight, I suggest that you have pictures taken of yourself by a skilled photographer. I suspect that a lot of us, especially those like myself, who don't have pictures taken of themselves often, probably have a somewhat bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1129612806110101862005-10-17T22:11:00.000-07:002005-10-19T11:31:39.636-07:00Damnit. I pulled my left quadriceps tonight. I've never done that before. It hurts like CRAZY. Damnit. I knew I should not have agreed to be in a softball league with my friends. The truth is, I joined just to help them fulfill their three female quota for the team. I thought I'd get hit in the face with a softball before I injured any muscles.I hadn't played softball very many times bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1128727037166112732005-10-07T15:58:00.000-07:002005-10-07T17:15:27.310-07:00To clarify what I said earlier, what I want is to reconcile how old I am with how old I act and how old I feel. The numbers should all be equal. Equal to 30. Last night, I watched a Bravo show titled "Great Things about Being 30". There were 20 silly and slightly amusing things. But since I have virtually no short-term memory anymore, I can't remember them well enough to provide a commentarybittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1128467720816471252005-10-04T16:11:00.000-07:002005-10-17T22:23:37.536-07:00I feel like such a baby, and I don't like it.For the first time in a very long time, probably not since my childhood, I want to act my age. But I don't know how to, and I don't know how to start.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1127345753688024212005-09-21T16:35:00.000-07:002005-09-21T18:05:22.066-07:00A couple months ago, my mom started a new project. She has been creating digital files from scans of slides containing images from my and my brother's babyhood and childhood. These slides hadn't been viewed since they were placed in slidesheets in binders 20+ years ago. My mom finished scanning two of about 12 binders so far. Already, there's been such a transformation. Mom and dad are bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1127174717289707952005-09-19T17:03:00.000-07:002005-09-21T17:06:38.610-07:00I am so sick of the nerdiness that surrounds me continually. The inescapble and heavy aura of it here in Silicon Valley, the childish activities and banter, the immature behavior past the mid-20s and the acceptance of all of it... IRKS ME GREATLY. Geekiness used to be cute and fun. I started becoming more and more turned off by it this year... and now I can't stand it. I don't want to see/bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1126658041004482522005-09-13T17:00:00.000-07:002005-10-03T03:49:40.320-07:00I did something for me this weekend. I had pictures taken of myself. After turning 30, I felt the need to do it, not just to document how I look before it all goes to crap, but also for the sake of vanity and self-esteem. I needed to feel sexy and glamorous again, and I figured some artsy, and heavily Photoshop'd digital pictures could help.I haven't seen the pictures yet. But I wouldn't mind bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1125344745987255702005-08-29T12:45:00.000-07:002005-09-19T17:09:56.290-07:00I cried.I thought that I'd just be a nervous wreck, as I usually am in the same situation, and that it would take the doctor about 10 minutes to calm me down so that she could stick me with the needle.During my last physical, my doctor said it's a good idea for me to have some blood tests taken. I hadn't had my blood drawn with a needle in years. With me, it's always an ordeal. I have a phobiabittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1124729941059984582005-08-22T09:57:00.000-07:002005-08-22T09:59:21.756-07:00Lia got engaged over the weekend! I'm so happy for her, and I'm excited about helping her plan her wedding!bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1124492911381447752005-08-19T16:04:00.000-07:002005-09-19T17:11:22.293-07:00I had dinner on Wednesday with my brother's girlfriend, Anne.* This was only the second time that I hung out with just her. I figure, she's the closest thing to a sister-in-law that I'll ever get. Might as well savor the almost while I can.Anne IMs me every now and then. The moment her IM windows pop up, I know something's wrong with her and and my brother, JR.* She's been more chatty this bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1124317270864350732005-08-17T15:16:00.000-07:002005-08-17T17:30:02.753-07:00I was shocked today when I received an email from my friend, who was to have gotten married this coming December, and I was to be a bridesmaid at her wedding. "The wedding is off." No reasons stated. No postponement mentioned. I'm not sure what to make of this...Just yesterday, we were making plans to see a seamstress this weekend about the bridesmaid dresses. You'd think that if I was a bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1123871784961660212005-08-12T11:36:00.000-07:002005-08-17T17:38:43.806-07:00During our weekly poker gatherings last night, the other three females - one of whom is already married, and the others are engaged - were gathered around a few bridal magazines, discussing this and that about weddings. As the token uncommitted female, I didn't want to just add myself to their conversation. I didn't want to appear too interested or feel awkward, being the odd one out, and I bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1123616388578008102005-08-09T12:39:00.000-07:002005-11-04T17:02:35.340-08:00I changed jobs in January, but I've been wary about mentioning anything about my new workplace here.I work at a company that provides email marketing services. We assist our customers in setting up and sending out emails. I won't say much else about what I do in my position, or how I feel about the work that I do (or don't do).One of the benefits of working here is the breakroom. Every Friday bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1121115443508416052005-07-11T13:45:00.000-07:002005-07-11T22:56:21.033-07:00We attended a friend's wedding yesterday... the first of the weddings-to-come among our "poker friends". (The other three couples in the poker group got engaged just within the last two months. Amazingly, without conspiring, they all managed to do so within weeks of each other. Up until now, I've been saying "I just don't want to be the last one [to get married]." Now that I've been suddenly bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1120678966285893942005-07-06T12:37:00.000-07:002005-07-07T17:29:50.776-07:00I had an accidental semi- Janet Jackson moment this past weekend at a pool party. The tradition at this annual event is to throw any and all dry persons into the pool, clothing included, especially against their will, and even as they are leaving the party... which is what I was doing right before I was tossed in. When a couple of guys ran over to hustle me into the pool, I put up a little bit bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1119314192905363592005-06-20T17:35:00.000-07:002005-06-21T09:38:32.440-07:00My sense of smell hasn't fully returned yet. I'm still not fully recovered from my cold. I've been sick ever since I turned 30. And I haven't yet addressed being 30 and unmmarried. I don't have many friends, and many of my few friends got engaged within the year. Exactly how does that make me feel? That is a good question... one that I haven't fully answered myself, but hope to dig into and bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1118879220271627722005-06-14T16:42:00.000-07:002005-06-15T17:18:38.680-07:00I just got back from a 7-day cruise with my parents and brother. Hanging out with the family was almost frustratingly boring. At the same time, being on a week-long cruise vacation was a very pleasant, if not ideal, way to recover from a 3-week long cold. (I thought it was the flu; the doctor said it was just one really bad muther of a cold.)We went to Alaska again (our first cruise two years agobittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1116996636123168082005-05-24T21:40:00.000-07:002005-05-26T16:34:12.166-07:00I'm going to try to make an effort to blog more often. (How many times have I said that already?)I've had the flu for the past 2 weeks. Despite being feverish and congested, I ran the Bay to Breakers two weekends ago. I didn't run at full speed, and I still out-ran my non-sick friends. And I wasn't sore at all afterwards. I was proud of my 30-year-old body for being able to do what it did bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1115616260757442302005-05-08T22:23:00.000-07:002005-05-08T22:24:33.803-07:00I turned 30 today.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1107147825212816422005-01-30T20:47:00.000-08:002005-01-31T10:45:29.996-08:00There's nothing like getting a call from your dad at 5am telling you that your mom is in the hospital dying to snap you out of your bored-of-life funk and temporarily stop you from primarily living metaphysically... and to break a four-month code of silence here.
My dad, my brother and I spent the last three days at Kaiser. Close to midnight on Thursday, my mom was admitted into the Critical bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094880877439050542004-09-10T22:22:00.000-07:002004-09-13T17:16:11.233-07:00Does this happen to you? You order a tall, no-whip frappuccino at Starbucks, and what you get is your frappucino... topped with a huge, taunting dallop of whip.
That's been happening to me and Babe at many different Starbucks all over the Bay Area. Eight out of ten times we get whip when we ask for none. What is going on?
Are all Starbucks employees semi-deaf, lacking any length of bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094855164710385242004-09-10T15:25:00.000-07:002004-09-13T17:16:54.530-07:00I got talked into joining a friend's fantasy football league.
The draft was on Sunday and took a good four hours to complete. The guys started talking about football and FFL weeks before the draft and the start of the season. They've all been super excited about it. It amazes me how much time and thought they all put into FFL. My friend who is managing the league considers FFL draft day thebittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094783192314028162004-09-09T19:16:00.000-07:002004-09-11T10:26:24.583-07:00I've had a horrendously garish nailpolish color on my toenails for a whole week.
I selected four nailpolish colors at the nail salon, and asked the woman giving me a pedicure to pick which one she thought was best. Three of the colors were pinkish, and one was a bright orange. She went for that one straightaway.
As soon as the color went on, I was aghast. Well, aghast is too strong a word. I bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094777266450166142004-09-09T17:41:00.000-07:002004-09-10T14:18:38.283-07:00My manager was out today, and I didn't have any work to do.
So I read all of Voltaire's Candide online. I read it for the first time today, though it was a recommended read by someone I knew briefly around two years ago. I won't take the time to give you my review of the story, but will say it was much more entertaining than today's news.
And I will give you this quote from the last chapter:
"Ibittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094077245425374812004-09-01T15:17:00.000-07:002004-09-02T11:39:36.203-07:00I registered to vote earlier this year so that I could finally do it. But the closer we get to the election date, and the more celebrities tell me to vote, and the more hype there is about voting, the less I want to. Now I don't know if I'm going to or not.
I have my reasons. One of them is that I know I'd be making an uneducated vote. And I can't allow myself to do that. Many other people will bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094012555232505392004-08-31T21:13:00.000-07:002004-09-07T11:24:19.226-07:00Today was a bad day for arms for me.
I went to the mall during lunch to try to exchange something at Forever 21. (I waited until I'm about to push past my 20's to start shopping at that store.) I've only bought a few things from there so far... a $5 tank top, an $11 black top for clubbing (almost went on Fri night), and the $13 thing I want to exchange for something else. I was thinking of bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1093306264447485972004-08-23T16:56:00.000-07:002004-08-23T17:45:24.023-07:00On Saturday, I went down to Stanford Shopping Center to pick up a bday gift for a friend. When I got there, a long line was forming near a center of the mall. People were waiting to meet and greet Alton Brown, the Good Eats guy, and have him sign books. A stage was set up for several cooking demonstrations.
Having not much else to do all day, I hung around and watched the Alton Brown make beef bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1093066481818307182004-08-20T22:20:00.000-07:002004-08-20T23:07:34.270-07:00We selected a roommate this evening. Phew! I'm SO glad we ended the search before the weekend.
Our new roommate's name is Colette, and she works at Genentech (i.e. possible job hook-up). She came by after work to check out the place, and we both agreed she's the best person we've seen in the past two weeks. I'm glad we waited to meet her before we offered anyone else the room.
I'm also glad bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1093034445194840952004-08-20T13:32:00.000-07:002004-08-20T22:18:50.463-07:00Any of you know where I can get this kind of Chinese watercolor painting of pandas outside of China? The gray fuzzy heads of the pandas are made by the bottom of cups. One of my friends has a really cute one of those paintings with several pandas in it. I want one! But I'm not going to China anytime soon.
bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1093031543385525652004-08-19T19:05:00.000-07:002004-08-20T13:29:11.956-07:00For the past week, my roommate, Genie, and I been interviewing people from Craigslist for the room that is available at our apartment. Amanda's moving out. I'm sad to see her go. She's the best roommate I've ever found on Craigslist. Before I met her, I didn't know that there are a ton of Scandinavian people living in certain parts of Minnesota.
Though the stress from needing to find a cool new bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1092875590550136502004-08-18T17:31:00.000-07:002004-08-20T23:11:16.736-07:00I guess I should mention... I did buy a tennis racquet a couple of weeks ago. I haven't used it yet, which means I bought it too early. I started taking guitar lessons. After two lessons, I've finally started believing that I really WILL be able to play the guitar. I WILL be able to play clear chords. And I WILL be able to rock out someday. I met the guy who's giving me lessons through someone I bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1092868482182694652004-08-18T15:34:00.000-07:002004-08-18T15:57:13.456-07:00Folks. I gotta tell ya... I AM ITCHY.
I hate bugs, and they love me. They love to bite me, suck my blood, have their way with my flesh... They're not biting me here at work. And everywhere else that I am, Babe is too. But Babe boasts no bug bites.
I got two big bug bites over the weekend while white water rafting and camping at Upper Cache Creek.
I've gotten a bunch of small bug bites in the bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1094581022409079602004-08-12T17:00:00.000-07:002004-09-07T11:17:02.410-07:00Most of the time, it's just "how's it going?" But every now and then, I get a "hey, what's new?" while I'm on one of my frequent visits to the break room at work. I get accosted for an update on my life, even as I am dashing out of the room, head down, eyes averted away from the other people in the room, so as not to elicit any signals that could be misinterpreted as a desire to socialize. If bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1088814334611636902004-07-02T17:25:00.000-07:002004-08-18T15:44:17.833-07:00What have I been up to?
Hula is going well. I like it so far. It's not easy, but with constant concentration, I can kinda move my hips and legs the way I'm supposed to move them. Not all that gracefully yet, though. After all day in a buildingful of programming men, it feels good being in a roomful of dancing women.
During lunch today, I played in a TT (table tennis, or ping pong, for all you bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1088124261870176932004-06-24T17:44:00.000-07:002004-07-02T18:01:47.070-07:00A day later, and I'm still tired from Tuesday night... when the dude that lives directly above Babe played his damn blasted unidentifiable music all night. That was the second night I couldn't sleep because the bass from his music was very audible through the walls. The first time, I tried unsuccessfully to sleep through it, and ended up staying up until around 5am. This time, I trudged bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1087423711689505202004-06-16T15:05:00.000-07:002004-06-17T11:26:13.780-07:00I had another interview yesterday, this time for a sales rep position.
I thought I was prepared enough for the questions I could be asked, but I really wasn't. I ummed and stuttered and paused and rolled my eyes to the upper right a lot while trying to articulate the answers I was thinking. I wasn't smooth. I should've practiced verbalizing my answers more. And I should've exaggerated morebittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1086999921326390792004-06-11T17:25:00.000-07:002004-06-17T10:21:50.966-07:00At Starbucks, I usually order a tall frap, coffee or chai latte.
Yesterday, I ordered a grande non-fat chai latte around 7:30pm, before having dinner. I found out that I can't do Starbucks grandes... at least not on an empty stomach. I start trippin'.
I went to a networking mixer with my grande non-fat chai latte in hand. I went to another one of these mixers a couple weeks ago. Figure bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1086732170651636662004-06-08T14:53:00.000-07:002004-06-08T15:08:06.473-07:00We were in Las Vegas this past weekend and Monday.
Vegas is better than ever. It's interesting to see how quickly the strip is developing and how big the casinos are getting. Hopefully, the new shops and attractions that are popping up all up and down the strip will result in more females visiting the city. There are still far more men than women in the casinos, and far more women than men bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1085701228211924592004-05-25T17:39:00.000-07:002004-05-27T16:52:01.203-07:00Today I went to a job fair. I hadn't been to one in a seriously long time.
I own no suits, no business slacks, no business skirts, no business heels, no pantyhose... So over the weekend, I searched hard and long for appropriate clothes to wear to the fair. I didn't find much that I liked, and I looked silly in what I tried on. I finally found a few pieces... a white collared shirt, a blackbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1085003632006944082004-05-19T14:46:00.000-07:002004-05-19T14:53:52.006-07:00We survived! Now I have at least a month to work on getting out of here before the axe finally gets to me.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1084830343387720602004-05-17T14:45:00.000-07:002004-05-17T14:52:01.913-07:00More work stuff... I'm supposed to find out tomorrow or Wednesday what is going to happen to the program and group at Sun that I work within, and subsequently, what is going to happen to my position. Whatever happens, I'm aiming to get out of this position and into a brand new career within a year, or obtain stable position that will hold me over until I figure out what I want to do with my my bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1084574301955965132004-05-14T15:37:00.000-07:002004-06-08T15:20:01.466-07:00Work life. A term that's currently not much unlike "endless eternity".
Work life has improved, thanks to the new iPod I got it for my birthday from Babe. The sound on my work laptop crapped out a couple of months ago, cutting me off from internet radio and a small collection of mp3s. And my pitiful collection of borrowed other people's CDs provides no respite.
On top of that, I've been bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1084251570140510082004-05-10T21:57:00.000-07:002004-05-11T08:49:57.670-07:00Figure now that Blogger has done all the work and created a bunch of new templates, I might as well use one of them. This one's closest to my other one. Maybe I'll make a more drastic change to a lighter, brighter template in the near future.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1084233070848204572004-05-10T16:40:00.000-07:002004-05-10T17:29:21.630-07:00How are they creating the toilet-plunger-breast look that seems to be the latest trend for nearly naked celebrity boobs? I've been baffled and oh-so-curious for a couple of months since they started popping up all over the place. Have you noticed them? How could you not?!
It's no longer hot enough to wear a gown with an ultra low plunging neckline that partially exposes a pair of hanging bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1083370018711359462004-04-30T17:06:00.000-07:002004-04-30T17:19:08.543-07:00You know you've been in The Area for too long when your first job interview in years takes place at the same building in an office a few doors down from the office you occupied during your first job right after college.
Yeah... it was weird, but also interesting.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1083350618094132102004-04-30T11:43:00.000-07:002004-04-30T17:17:50.420-07:00In the less than thirty seconds that it takes for me to drive through the east end of the Dumbarton bridge every day, dozens of bugs die mercilessly on my car.
Death sounds like a muted pitter patter of brisk rain on my windshield.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1083351230520427792004-04-28T17:00:00.000-07:002004-05-01T08:55:43.716-07:00Acuteshifter
I don't know what it is or does. I see it from time to time within the webpages that I edit.
Is it not such a cool-sounding word? It has an esoteric, geeky chic-y, techno ring to it. I like it lots. If I had the skills, I'd write an electronica song, and that's what I'd name it...
Acuteshifterbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1083087464112488372004-04-27T10:37:00.000-07:002004-04-27T10:41:51.793-07:00I'm still alive.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1081194309608940802004-04-05T12:45:00.000-07:002004-04-05T13:07:29.013-07:00I've been sitting/lying around and thinking about nothing at all more and more these days, and that concerns me.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1080857010302340572004-04-01T14:03:00.000-08:002004-04-01T14:31:46.013-08:00When I go to get facials in SF Chinatown, I hear the facialists chatting merrily away in Chinese with the other customers about things that always seem amusing. They speak animatedly, they laugh... they can hardly speak English. So while they're working on my face, we're silent. Every now and then they try to tell me something about my face, but it seems to be a struggle for them to find the bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1080769315253774762004-03-31T13:36:00.000-08:002004-03-31T13:56:19.340-08:00We found a new roommate. Another stranger. Genie's moving in to the apartment tommorrow. She's 23, and she's never lived with people other than her relatives before. I'm a little bit apprehensive about that.
I'll reward myself with a better living situation when I find a better job.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1080765969370040102004-03-31T12:45:00.000-08:002004-04-01T12:01:07.840-08:00Seems like every other person I know that is around my age is heading back to school for another degree, getting married, and/or buying a place right now, or is planning to do one of those things in the near future. Some people have already done one or more or all of those things. All significant things, yet deceptively insignificant, since so many are doing them...
It's that time. Time for bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1080327598061514552004-03-26T10:59:00.000-08:002004-03-26T11:03:23.043-08:00Dad is getting his gallbladder removed today. Luckily, that's all that was bothering him. No hepatitis, no cancer. I'm so relieved. bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1080162482382760342004-03-24T13:08:00.000-08:002004-03-24T13:11:25.543-08:00Smile.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-108000135995307332004-03-22T16:22:00.000-08:002004-03-22T17:11:11.966-08:00On Friday night, we went to the Maria Ann Hsiao Memorial Foundation's benefit dinner and auction. I have only one dress to wear, and it's not black. But I think I was alright showing up in rose and coffee chiffon. A few people said they like the dress, hopefully not with undetected disapproval or sarcasm.
I really like what the foundation is setting out to accomplish: "This Art foundation bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079989071598586192004-03-22T12:57:00.000-08:002004-07-22T13:35:34.280-07:00That one time in 8th grade that I was called despicable, it was by my English teacher, Mr. Daly. He was in the classroom doorway about to exit when he turned around, saw me, and said, "Wipe that smirk off your face, Y*m! You're despicable!"
A few minutes before, he'd called another student in the class a slut, and she'd promptly walked out of class to go tell on him. How and the why he was bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079987841736500582004-03-22T12:37:00.000-08:002004-03-22T12:54:26.856-08:00We watched Annie Hall last night. I didn't think I would like the movie 'cuz it's "old", but I did.
But what's up with people seeing California as a state full of health nuts? Was that just back in the 70s and 80s? Or just the 70s and 80s in LA? I never picked up on that. Anything that happened around here at that time I thought was an America-wide phenomenon. Childhood ignorance.
I bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079983518699030692004-03-22T11:25:00.000-08:002004-03-22T17:09:15.186-08:00"May uh hep you?"
No.
You may not hep me.
I do not want to be hepped.
There will be no hepping happening here.
Go hep yourself.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079749503799605032004-03-19T18:25:00.000-08:002004-03-24T11:02:43.466-08:00Amanda and I selected someone to move in with us last Monday. He backed out on us this Monday. We haven't had any luck this week finding someone else to move in. The fish just aren't biting.
I haven't had good experiences with Craigslist users in the past few months. The worst one was a woman who bought an item I listed. She paid me through Paypal, and had me send the item to her in bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079645179443551042004-03-18T13:26:00.000-08:002004-03-18T15:24:08.280-08:00Spores.
I love that word. I think it's cute-sounding.
Spores. Masses of microspores. Pollen. I love the way pollen looks. Funny, furry, delightful, little, bright yellow, spherical bundles. They fall from the trees and litter the ground lightly like a thin, carefree layer of fuzzy, clumpy snow... easily crushable into a fine heap of spore particles.
I had pollen balls on the hoodbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079581433466029662004-03-17T19:43:00.000-08:002004-03-18T14:25:25.466-08:00Before I left work, my brother IMed me about my dad.
Dad had some blood tests taken this week, and the results were abnormal. He's had stomach problems throughout the year, but his regular doctor just kept telling him to eat better. Korean man... should stay away from the kimchee, spicy foods, etc. Josh told me that one time the pain was so bad that my dad called 911. Why wasn't I told bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079582277558162132004-03-17T17:16:00.000-08:002004-03-22T17:40:20.810-08:00I'm the type of person who would celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Why St. Patrick's Day, and not Hanukah, I can't tell you... because I don't know. I've just had more of an interest in Ireland in the past. I know next to nothing about the Jewish people, having been born here on the California coast (as if that's a valid excuse... I think it really is).
I know next to nothing about the Irish bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079562795508432712004-03-16T14:33:00.000-08:002004-03-18T13:15:08.700-08:00I found out today that my friend, Milly, just got engaged over the weekend. I'm excited for her!
I was wondering when it was going to happen, since it seemed like a when-not-if thing. She and her man are planning on getting married in more than a year, maybe even in 2007. Gosh... I told her we could all start planning our own 2007 weddings right now, it's so far into the future.
And she bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079562622102648832004-03-15T16:21:00.000-08:002004-03-17T15:06:58.250-08:00I received a second email from my ex with a file attached that contains a virus.
I haven't talked to my ex in more than a year, and about a month or so ago I got an email from him with "Hi" in the subject line, nothing in the email body, virus attached. Good thing I didn't click on that attachment or the one I got today in his email.
I heard that the company my ex works for often has bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1079030387372117382004-03-11T10:39:00.000-08:002004-03-11T10:45:52.873-08:00OK. I'm just about over it. I feel better today.
I figure, can't take away from me what I never had. I never had those vacations. I never had those material goods. 13k (extra 3k for state) is my small savings over three months plus a few more months of wages, granted I hold on to this job for at least another half a year.
So what's to sweat about? I've still got a lot of life. After all,bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078991008079549772004-03-10T23:43:00.000-08:002004-03-17T15:08:07.500-08:00Every night, a bird chirps furiously and incessantly for what seems like hours, just outside my bedroom window. It's still chirping when I fall asleep. It's still chirping when I wake up in the middle of the night.
There's only one string of chirps, so I assume it's a solo performance by the same bird every night. It repeats hundreds of different patterns of chirps, none of them exactly bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078963390220121342004-03-10T16:03:00.000-08:002004-03-11T10:48:15.000-08:00Back in the poorhouse. Life, as I knew it over the last 3 months, is over.
No more poker. A lot less steak and sushi, a lot more tasteless home-cooked dinners. Wheat bread and turkey for every weekday lunch. No visiting Lia in Chicago or the cousins in Boston. No vacation in San Diego or Hawaii. No vacations, period. No new handbag. No new sandals. No more wardrobe upgrades. No bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078949300111150602004-03-10T12:08:00.000-08:002004-03-11T10:50:45.653-08:00I've always preferred to suffer alone. Maybe not always. Maybe I just learned to suffer best alone while forced to do so on my own as Jennie the child. Maybe that's the only way I know to do it.
When I'm feeling sub-optimal, I tend to retreat from the masses and avoid friends. When the situation is particularly dismal, I try to push the closest friends away. I feel like running away from bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078944436746204092004-03-10T10:47:00.000-08:002004-03-10T10:50:49.200-08:00Life is like a box of chocolates... it makes you fat.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078866846647993062004-03-09T13:14:00.000-08:002004-03-09T17:11:22.856-08:00I finally sold a piece of jewelry that I'd been trying to sell for awhile.
It was a gift from one of my ex-boyfriends. A thoughtful gift, though not what I wanted or needed at the time he gave it to me. Thoughtful, yet not really thoughtful. I would've been much better off with the money it cost him to buy it. I needed money for my next meal more than I needed jewelry. After he was out bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078787649987659922004-03-08T15:14:00.000-08:002004-03-10T15:58:06.670-08:00I just finished using Turbotax online, and it says that I owe the IRS a bit over 10k this year.
Ten THOUSAND dollars.
Now wait a minute... there must be a typo somewhere... *checks, re-checks, and re-re-checks* Uh... nope. All of my 2003 wages are on a 1099-MISC, and I paid about 4k in estimated taxes already... so 10k must be the rest of the income taxes I owe plus medicare and social bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078520312245759252004-03-05T12:58:00.000-08:002004-03-05T13:08:19.420-08:00I think they should give the character Ryan from The O.C. an Asian female love interest. It would work. And Marissa really sucks. It'll be interesting to see how the show turns her into a well-liked character in the future. bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078471132857572192004-03-04T23:18:00.000-08:002004-03-05T12:04:50.466-08:00The damn blasted dust bunnies were collecting on my guitar. So earlier this week, I put it away in the brand new guitar case Babe got me. I hadn't touched it in months.
Now that the guitar is lying comfortably in its plush, blue velvet-lined coffin, I want to make a promise to myself to take it back out again after this weekend. I also need to start running again. bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078430365305158622004-03-04T11:59:00.000-08:002004-03-04T23:16:26.123-08:00Are are any commercially sold machines that effectively prevent the formation of dust? A machine kinda like a noise-cancelling machine. A gadget to cancel all dust. Stop it before it starts.
I guess any machine that could eradicate dust mites, like an anti-microbial air purifier, would work. But what about something that specifically targets dust? Are those types of machines sold to bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078429503607662612004-03-04T11:45:00.000-08:002004-03-08T15:26:07.326-08:00I feel very different from who I was last year, 2 years ago, and 3 years ago.
Core person is the same. Fundamental wants and needs are the same. Everyday goings-ons and routine of actions and attitudes are different. Outlook is definitely different.
I feel as if who I am now is more congruent with who I was as a child. I am more me than ever. And that feels good and right.
I was bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1078353890491340932004-03-03T14:43:00.000-08:002004-03-05T11:55:51.403-08:00In dire need of audio and visual stim... wouldn't even mind an overload for a couple of hours max...bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077848264461858582004-02-26T18:17:00.000-08:002004-02-26T18:32:47.076-08:00Last night, in another anticlimactic moment, I bought the laptop. I'm hoping it will change my life. That's not too much to expect from an $1800 purchase, is it?bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077761807595637132004-02-25T18:16:00.000-08:002004-02-26T18:23:25.983-08:00My roommate, Joe, bought a condo. He's moving out close to the end of March.
If you know anyone who might be interested in taking the master bedroom in my apartment in San Mateo, please let me know.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077739306745132892004-02-25T12:00:00.000-08:002004-02-25T15:20:48.560-08:00There's a particular feeling that I had many months ago that I want to have right now. The funny thing is, the longing for that feeling is almost as satisfying.
Isn't that how it always is?bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077739518455596272004-02-24T19:02:00.000-08:002004-02-25T16:35:55.140-08:0028 years, and I never bothered to remember how many days there are in each month of the year.
I know there are 31 in October, December, January, and there are 28 days in February in a non-leap year. But that's about the extent of my certainty. Let me go consult my calendar...
You'd think that the number of days per each month is an important, significant, and reliable enough lump of bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077750958964426592004-02-23T15:14:00.000-08:002004-02-26T18:30:29.826-08:00On Friday, I had an interesting yet disturbing talk with coworker Doug after we went out to lunch. Somehow it popped out that during the period of time last year when I was noticeably curt and standoff-ish toward him, he thought I was acting that way because I was romantically attracted to him and was upset at him for not going after me or returning my feelings. He said coworker John thought bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077219824306736172004-02-19T11:17:00.000-08:002004-02-20T11:26:36.746-08:00The whole process of choosing and buying a new Dell laptop is excrutiating. (Maybe even moreso right now 'cuz it's PMS week for me.) I simply go to the Dell website, and I'm already frustrated.
I'm probably going to get the D600. After spec'ing it out for my needs and wants, the total cost is around $1800... which I'm not at all happy about. I was prepared to spend around $1400, and no bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077086123510809992004-02-17T22:35:00.000-08:002004-02-17T22:38:07.763-08:00Have you ever caught me in the middle of editing?bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077085558658058342004-02-17T22:22:00.000-08:002004-03-05T12:13:28.420-08:00I almost forgot. There was a strike five: not bringing the camera so the girl can have something by which to remember an immemorable night. I'm big on taking pictures, and I made a resolution to take a lot more this year. So far, I haven't done so well on that resolution.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077062089997870032004-02-17T15:49:00.000-08:002004-02-17T22:34:39.466-08:00I'm back to putting premium gas in my car. I tried using middle-grade gas for three tanks. Wasn't acceptable. There was a lot more engine noise, grittiness, a lack of smoothness, and lower mileage by about 20 miles. I thought I'd try to save at least $50 a year on gas, but that idea's been squashed. bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1077055694016984572004-02-17T14:08:00.000-08:002004-02-17T22:24:46.700-08:00We went to a Linkin Park concert last night. It was intense. My lower back still hurts a little.
I like Linkin Park's sounds. Robust, exciting, aggressive, and ironically soothing. But I've never had a taste for their lyrics. Way too can-you-kill-me-now, full of despair, and self-defeating. The lyrics turned me off to their music in the past. Not that I can remember them all. I made upbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1076905157303192552004-02-15T20:19:00.000-08:002006-10-22T21:26:22.733-07:00I decided to let Babe make the Valentine's Day plans this year. I'd done most of the planning in previous relationships, and I'm plenty ready to sit back and be romanced for a change. Babe and I didn't go on any real dates together before we hooked up and got together, and I bought him a suit this past Christmas so that he wouldn't have "I have nothing fancy to wear" as an excuse for not takingbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1076092128918059482004-02-06T10:18:00.000-08:002004-02-06T10:31:09.576-08:00100 Years - Five for Fightingbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1076030773929942742004-02-05T17:26:00.000-08:002004-02-09T11:20:27.686-08:00I got another work contract extension for three months. Come May, I'll be able to say I've been dating this position for three years. Pass May, and I'll surpass the length of my longest boyfriend relationship ever.
I've managed to make a few friends among the non-engineers here at the Fremont office. They keep me smiling and connecting with other human beings when I most need it, during the bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1075932554975048682004-02-04T14:05:00.000-08:002004-02-04T14:25:47.936-08:00Nice. An article about tollbooth people ("toll taker" seems to be the official title) that answers some of my questions about them... but doesn't explain how this guy was able to let me pass through without paying and not get in trouble.bittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1075765556934223602004-02-02T15:45:00.000-08:002004-03-03T13:38:44.373-08:00Show me men in g-strings cooking and serving up chocolate-covered delicacies.
Men got the Lingerie Bowl. And all the exploitative Superbowl commercials I had to grin and bear on Sunday.
The world that is the United States of America seems to me to be taking brisk steps backwards in terms of attitudes toward women and the portrayal of women. Sexism, misogynism, women-as-sex-object-ism are onbittersweetienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3554747.post-1075440652719974802004-01-29T21:30:00.000-08:002004-01-29T21:41:32.140-08:00The post-holiday, post-vacation vacation bliss is gone, and I'm suffering the withdrawal.
I've been pretty grumpy lately. I have that new-year-haven't-done-anything-new-yet, out-of-the-scene-for-too-long, don't-know-how-to-dress, don't-know-how-to-look-good-anymore, I'm too-old-for-this, i'm-losing-it, what-am-i-doing-with-my-life, time-is-ticking, not-sure-why-I'm-sad feeling.
I think a bittersweetienoreply@blogger.com